Beautiful Hijab Story

[Bhootni Chandni]

If you were born as a Muslim, do you ever imagine how life is for a non-Muslim individual who just becomes a Muslim?

My name is Kelsey Long. From my name, you may guess that I am a revert to Islam. My hijab story, like the stories of many other sisters who revert to Islam, is one of guidance from Allah.

I have been around Muslims and Islam just about my whole life. Indeed, I am thankful to Allah for that. It is true that I was always attracted to the Muslim students during my school years. Subhan Allah, something about them attracted me. I became good friends with Muslim students.

I recently reverted to Islam after a trip to Morocco for an anthropology/history class. When I went there, I realized that I have never been happier in my life. The Muslim environment was amazing. I was able to see Islam in the daily lives of people and observe how content everyone was. It is good to remember the hadith:

[Bhootni Chandni]

“The best of people are those with the most excellent character.” (Tabarani, Sahih)

I noticed something beautiful among the Muslims. I saw how happy everyone was and how much they loved and cared for each other. Truly, it was amazing.

When I returned to America, I made the easiest decision of my life: to become a Muslim. The reason I say it was an easy decision is because I had no doubts that I wanted to enter Islam. Alhamdulillah, all praise to Allah.

I immediately began researching and trying to figure out the rules of Islam. Of course, the concept of hijab was very important, and hijab was one of the first factors I had to think about. I knew that it was not a cultural issue. Alhamdulillah. I knew that hijab is indeed a commandment from Allah. Allah has made a way to protect the dignify , integrity, and the honor of women.

Allah states in the Qur’an:

[Bhootni Chandni]

“And tell the believing women to lower their gaze and guard their modesty, and not to display their adornment except that which appears ordinarily thereof, and to draw their veils over their necks and bosoms..” (Sura An-Noor 24:31)

A huge problem, one I face to this day, is that my parents don’t know I am a Muslimah. Allah knows best how difficult it is for revert brothers and sisters to change and confront many things in their lives once they become Muslim. It is not easy at all. But alhamdulillah, because Allah makes things easy and insha’Allah rewards are waiting.

Do you know how I spent the rest of my summer once I became Muslim? I used the time on working hard, trying to memorize the prayer. I also talked to my parents about Islam. Unfortunately, they were no so fond of it. When Ramadan came, I fasted alhamdulillah. I was determined to follow the rules of Islam… I would not give up.

During my sophomore year at college, I eagerly began looking for an Islamic center since I wanted to continue to learn Islam and practice how to pray. Seeking knowledge was important to me.

Allah states in the Qur’an:

Say (O Muhammad, to mankind): “If you really love Allah then follow me, Allah will love you and forgive you your sins. And Allah is Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful.”

At first, I didn’t wear the hijab. However, I had a plan. My plan was I would wear it on Fridays. So, as soon as I was released from my Lab class, I literally ran straight to the masjid. My iman was strong enough to make me race out like that. I would pant and be out of breath during the Jummah prayers. One thing I do recall is the warm kindness of the Muslimahs there. The sisters were so helpful to me. May Allah reward them for their kind treatment, insha’Allah.

Fridays became a personal special day when I would wear the hijab. Then, something started happening in me. Guilt started to take root in my heart. I was overwhelmed with a feeling of guilt.

I felt guilty about the days I didn’t wear the hijab. I didn’t want to be like the rest of the college girls in my campus, who were not modest. I wanted to obey the commandment of Allah, and Allah commanded women to wear the hijab.

Then, I decided to punish myself. I thought to myself that if I wear the hijab sometimes and not all the time, then I shouldn’t wear the hijab at all! There were days when I felt horrible. I felt terrible all day long when I didn’t have the hijab to cover me. When I did wear the hijab, I was immediately in a better mood and felt so wonderful about everything.

There was also something else that got me thinking.

[Bhootni Chandni]

When I learned about how women in other countries were not allowed to wear the hijab, I was saddened. I thought to myself how in these countries it’s not okay to dress modestly, yet it’s okay to dress half naked? It’s okay to obey the Shaytan, yet it’s not okay to obey Allah?

This was a moment when I realized how blessed I was. Allah has put me in a country where I am allowed to wear the hijab, as there is religious tolerance. I have been blessed with the beautiful religion of Islam. Allah has guided me this far. I wanted to be a respectable Muslimah, a Muslimah who would be a good example for women everywhere. Just as Muslims inspired me from my school and from Morocco, I also , for the sake of Allah, wanted to be an inspiration to others.

I indeed wanted to do the fard: to wear the hijab.

Then, I started to wear the hijab every single day! Who knew? A girl from the States born as a non-Muslim, would wear the hijab with pride! I have no regrets about it whatsoever. I love how I feel wearing the hijab. I feel protect and honored by Allah.

Yes, I get funny looks when I walk past some people. But I would rather get funny looks, than disobey Allah.

Sister, if you were born as a Muslimah, then you have been blessed to have Muslim parents and Muslim surroundings. Me, I had to struggle and walk against the wind to discover the truth, which Allah guided me to.

Sister, if you are a revert to Islam or even born as a Muslimah, and hijab seems difficult, then take it one step at a time. Remember, Allah has commanded women, in the Qur’an, to cover themselves.

I love Islam. I thank Allah everyday that I am a Muslimah. Believe it or not, it’s like a dream too good to be true.

I can’t deny the truth when Allah states in the Qur’an:

“Those who believe (in the Oneness of Allah), and whose hearts find rest in the remembrance of Allah, Verily, in the remembrance of Allah do hearts find rest.” (13:28)